Archive for December, 2009

Feminism and Femsubs

The Sexual Manifesto: Can BDSM Be Feminist?
by Christine Borden for the San Francisco Appeal:

“Images of women crying out in pain and receiving a sound beating don’t usually scream “feminist.” For some, it’s cause for alarm, calling up notions of rape and patriarchal power and privilege. For others, though, BDSM fits hand in hand with sex-positive feminism. BDSM encompasses a wide variety of behaviors, kinks, and actions, but literally it boils down to: bondage and discipline, dominance and submission, and sadism and masochism. Which can mean anything from erotic tickling to a 24/7 slave-master relationship to spanking to, yes, a Dom and his very bad, very naughty female submissive. It’s understandable why men beating up women for pleasure can make some people squirm (and not in a good way), but BDSM can be a very feminist lifestyle. First, not all subs are women and not all Doms (Dommes) are men, but that’s neither here nor there for those absolutely offended by this deplorable abuse of women. But let’s get down to–how do you say?–brass tacks. Much of BDSM is power play, and gosh, if examining power relations within sex isn’t so Women’s Studies, God help those poor, misguided womyn. Power always lurks in the sexual setting, whether it’s a violent upset in power in the case of rape, or whether it’s simply a matter of giving or receiving. Some like it equal, some like it hot, and some like a good foot to the face as they’re bent over against a wall taking it up the rear…” Read full article here.

Bonkers

From eSarcasm, here’s the article “When Bonking Goes Bonkers: The 10 Strangest Sexual Fetishes”. Now I know that the reader’s reaction to lists like this is supposed to be shock and laughter - a spot of harmless internet rubbernecking at all those freaky fetishists out there - but the thing is, the fantasies listed just don’t sound all that strange to me. Actually, some sound like they could be quite fun (I’ve always fancied myself as something of a sexual predator who veers between spectre, fembot and praying mantis). Either cyberspace has got more prudish or I’ve got kinkier.

Bad Press: The Jan Moir Award for Shoddy Journalism

My first nomination for the Jan Moir Award for Shoddy Journalism is this article by Johor Baru in Malaysia’s “The Star” newspaper:

“Police: Hairstylist died of heart failure during unnatural sex.

The hairstylist, who was found dead, naked, bound and gagged, died of heart failure brought upon by excessive excitement during an unnatural sex game. Nusajaya OCPD Supt Abdul Aziz Ahmad said the post-mortem showed that Tang Kin Kok, 49, had internal bleeding that could have been caused by sexual stimulation. He added that the victim also had multiple signs of penetration through his anus. “The heart failure could have been triggered as the victim became too excited when committing unnatural sex,” Supt Abdul Aziz said when contacted here on Monday. He said while the post-mortem showed no criminal element leading to the death, police had identified a few of Tang’s male acquaintances to assist in the investigation. “We are going to apprehend them soon,” he said, adding that anyone who knew the victim was encouraged to come forward. Supt Abdul Aziz urged anyone with information to contact the police hotline at 07-2212999 or the nearest police station. On Saturday, Tang was found murdered, naked, gagged and with his hands and legs bound, by a housemate in his room at a rented house in Bandar Selesa Jaya here, around 9.50pm.”

When a 49-year-old man dies during a particularly thrilling bout of bondage bumsex, it’s considered “murder”. Oh yes, he was just “too excited” and so his lover’s sexual skills killed him. The implication is that any other form of copulation simply isn’t exciting enough to cause cardiac arrest, and therefore safe. Yet thousands and thousands of heterosexuals suffer heart attacks and snuff it during conventional, lift-up-the-nightie, missionary-position sex every year - ask any paramedic. It’s far more common than you’d imagine. To die having sex is about as natural as natural causes come, whether the sex itself is straight, gay, vanilla, or kinky.

Separate mistakes in this article could be forgiven on the grounds of mistranslation and medical ignorance. Still, taken as a whole, it’s despicable. I therefore launch the Jan Moir Award for Shoddy Journalism and nominate Johor Baru as first entrant. Every journalist nominated will be sent a prize appropriate to his or her personal prejudices. In this case, it’ll probably be some form of butt plug or similar, sent c/o the newspaper. Give me a shout if you think of a good idea for Baru’s prize. More nominations coming soon. Feel free to submit your own.

DVD Review in Forum Magazine

A review by Ms Slide, published in Forum Magazine. Click on the thumbnail to read the full article on the DVD “Mistress R’eal @ The Clink”:

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